Whatever Skateboard’s Official Review – Tony Flop Pro Skater 5
Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 is out and the results are in: its not good. You know its for real when die hard Tony Hawk fans like ourselves are bearing the bad news. The Tony Hawk hype machine had pumped this skating game up to 11 only to have it aggressively panned on social media and by critics. A quick read of comments on Tony Hawk’s Instagram lets you know how people feel. Sadly Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 doesn’t even let you design your own skateboard. And unfortunately for skaters this is the most recently released major skateboard game so there’s no real option but to buy it and complain :-( And that brings us to our Official Whatever Skateboards Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 Review.
SCORE: 7.2 / 10 (NO BUENO)
What Does Whatever Skateboards Know About Skateboard Games?
For one we play the XBox One in our office constantly and we’ve logged some major hours designing our own skateboard in Skate 3 and Skate 4. While we don’t have an Official Whatever Skateboards Review of Olli Olli and Olli Olli 2 we’ve logged A LOT of hours on them and even have some of the global high scores. Not to mention several members of our team used to be game developers and had platinum hits so we’re not just parroting the rest of the reviews.
The Good: This Game Has Some Moments
As with any game you can see the developers and production team did try put their hearts in to it. Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 shines during certain surprise and delight moments: putting the first weird head on your skater, popping beach balls in The Berrics pool, and even firing explosive rockets out of your skateboard. The subtle trick names as you clear gaps and grind rails are good for a smile and the quippy mission names are the same way. Some of the missions are better than others, and there are a few times the rides lines really are spectacular. Overall the stock levels are actually pretty fun and larger than we expected. Oddly enough one of the best parts of this game is the stupid Robomoto intro.
The Bad: Yikes
Our first office play session was hours long and we unlocked the third level. The next day we went to play again and all of our game data had been reset. That meant hours of replaying the missions and the complete lack of story (unlike THPS Underground) became painful. We bailed. We forced ourselves to pick it back up again. Every private match ended in a crashed game and needing an XBox One reboot. You can’t even switch Missions from within a Mission, you have to go all the way out to “Freeskate” mode even though the menu opens up. You hit the left menu button and the menu opens on the right of the screen. Hit the right menu button and the menu opens on the left side of the screen. In a nutshell this game is mentally painful to play.
The Ugly: This Game Is Actually Worse Than You Realize
This game does a bit of a disservice to gaming. Where the original Tony Hawk Pro Skater was innovative and moved gaming forward this game was a cold rehash of the Tony Hawk franchise. The best new move was stolen from Olli Olli and the “big new thing” is a multiplayer open world no one wants to be in. Given the years between the release of THPS4 and THPS5 this game should have been a glorious reboot of one of the last god-tier gaming franchises from the golden era of 32 and 64 bit gaming. Instead we got the Star Wars: Episode 1 of skateboard games. Everyone was hoping for a new version of an old classic but instead what we got was the same old game. There goes another unicorn :’-(
The soundtrack is another great place to see something terribly wrong with Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5: its all rock and punk. There’s no EDM, no dubstep, no hip hop, and no rap. The original soundtrack was incredible, this was huge chance to reboot it and instead what we got was a small can of TH approved music. We know he likes that stuff already, its not new to brand followers. And its certainly not in touch with modern music. Does the Hawk listen to anything but guitars? What about any other skaters in the game? Do they have ears and like music? We’ll never know.
Unlike the original Tony Hawk Pro Skater which had a bevy of famous skaters this version pretty much lets you pick from Tony Hawk, Tony Hawk Jr., and Tony Hawkette. Where the hell is Rodney Mullen, Evan Smith, Kilian Martin, or any female skaters? Why can’t I make my own face on a skater? Why can’t I skate my own skate? The original Tony Hawk Pro Skater went so far past Tony Hawk himself that it made him stand out as a remarkable individual in a community and finalized his status as a pop culture god. Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 continues to celebrate the Tony Hawk legacy but never gets past the Tony Hawk brand enough to connect with anyone actually playing the game.
In the end it felt like THPS5 was a game made for one person to play: Tony Hawk.
Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 PROTIPS
- Metacritic gave this a 1.5 / 5
- Gamespot gave this a 3.0 / 10
- Wait until much later or even after the holidays to get this game if you have to buy it the price will be much lower.
Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 is Almost Here! Break Out Your Control Sticks, The Skateboard Video Game King Is Back!
Its really happening and Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 is back and set to release in just a few short days on September 29th. We’ve already got our THPS5 pre-orders placed, our XBox One controllers buffed, and our thumbs ready for action. We play a lot of skating video games at the Whatever Skateboards office, from the Skate series to setting Top 10 Global Records on Ollie Ollie, but Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 is going to be the ultimate. You may have forgotten but let us remind you: we’re a San Diego skateboard company and that means we rock everything Hawk. We’ve been drooling over the gameplay footage, soundtrack, and hype for weeks. Now that Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 is ready for release (remember, its been almost 13 years since THPS4 was released) we can barely contain ourselves.
Make Me Drool THPS5
Easy. First off its the most major release since in the Tony Hawk Pro Skater series since you started skating. Remember stick jamming on THPS the Playstation 1 / N64 versions? Us too. Remember the incredible soundtracks? Yep. Remember the ridiculous air and tricks? YEP. Its all back, and its better than ever. Online play, create a park, real world locations, and everything you ever wanted. And oh yeah, they added in the slam down grind feature from Ollie Ollie that really lets you jam around and pop on and off.
I Can Haz Customization? Can I Create My Own Skater and Skateboard?
It is confirmed in Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 you can create your own skateboard deck and even do customization on your skater. This is huge for the series and was a major draw for Skate 3 and Skate 4. Word on the street is in THPS5 you’ll be able to use some major brand graphics and art so we’re stoked to see what THPS brings. As the gold standard for skateboard customization we’re glad to see Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 get in on the action we’re excited to see if there’s a way to print your Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 custom skateboard design in real life.
Oh Wait What Online Mode!?
Yes this time around you can build and share your own parks. Other skaters will be skating next to you as you’re hitting tricks & lines for objectives so you can watch other people and share your best lines live. No word yet on if you need to share the ramp but we’ll keep posted on how easy it is to snake. It looks pretty cool to be shredding a park with your friends online, especially if they aren’t skaters or live across the country. No substitute for a good skate sesh but after you push home this game is going to be awesome to crash on the couch with.
Tunez! Tell Me About the Tony Hawk Pro Skater 5 Soundtrack Bruh!
Chill, you know its going to be good. Here’s the THPS5 track list:
- Anti-Flag – Stars and Stripes
- Atmosphere – Southsiders
- Black Pistol Fire – Hipster Shakes
- Bully – Milkman
- Cloud Nothings – I’m Not Part of Me
- Cold Cave – A Little Death to Laugh
- Connie Price and the Keystones – International Hustler
- Crass Mammoth – All 149
- Deaf Poets – Degenerate Mind
- Death – Keep On Knocking
- Death From Above 1979 – Virgins
- Deer Mother – When The Wolves Come Out
- Doomtree – Mini Brute
- Fake P – Rorschach
- Family Force 5 – Raised By Wolves
- Four Year Strong – Go Down In History
- Harlan – Moment To Myself
- Hundred Visions – Our Ritual
- Hungry Hands – Highline
- Icon For Hire – Cynics and Critics
- Killer Be Killed – Wings of Feather and Wax
- New Politics – Everywhere I Go
- Plague Vendor – Black Sap Scriptures
- Ratatat – Cream on Chrome
- RattBlack – Skate Rock
- Royal Blood – Little Monster
- State Champs – Secrets
- Temples – Shelter Song
- The Orwells – Who Needs You
- The Schitzophonics – Rat Trap
- The Sheds – Bad Things are Bad
- Yogi & Skrillex – Burial
Who Made It? When Is It Being Released?
Activision, and this vidya game is scheduled for release on PlayStation 4 and Xbox One on September 29, 2015, with releases on PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 on November 10, 2015. Want more info? WIKI IT BRO
We got Tony Hawk Circuit Boards, the Remote Control Mini Finger Skateboards by Tony Hawk, Birdhouse, and HEXBUG!
You know we’re stoked on these remote control Tony Hawk Circuit Board skateboards, we wrote an earlier article on our blog before they were even released. BUT NOW WE HAVE THEM AND THEY ARE AWESOME. And after several days of not sleeping or eating and playing with them constantly we came to and decided these mini skateboards deserved an Official (capital O) Review.
SCORE: 9.2 / 10 with Skatepark (WORTH IT)
What’d We Get?
We got it all pretty much because we wanted every skateboard and skatepark. We have just about every possible skate, a bunch of power axels, loads of remotes, tons of trucks, wheels out the wazoo, and most importantly the FULL skatepark. Seriously, we kinda went nuts on things and it was a bit of a Christmas present for the office. We only managed to get a few pictures before we tore in to them like feral animals so here’s what we got:
These are remote control finger / mini skateboards. We’ll say that one more time: Remote. Control. They are SO FUN. And they can cruise pretty seriously, we drove some of them outside 10+ city blocks on sidewalk and they go about as fast as you can walk. Incredibly fast. The battery life is great, we’ve been playing with them constantly and haven’t worn out a single poweraxel yet. They have some decent horsepower behind them so you can really get them going, especially in the skatepark features. Remember, they have two speeds! You can use the remote to trigger between them but we pretty much leave them on turbo boost 24/7.
The skatepark! The skates are fun on their own but the ramps, halfpipes, rails, and basically the entire skatepark setup makes the Tony Hawk Circuit Boards really shine. They’re sized perfectly for the deck size and they’re definitely doable. When you actually get the hang of going back and forth in the halfpipe there is a 100% chance you’ll wish you could skate vert that tough IRL. We *highly* recommend getting the full skatepark setup and not just one feature, (ramp, halfpipe, bowl, etc.) Its worth the few extra bucks to have a bunch of feature pieces to work with. Here’s one of our setups we call the “Megaramp”
The bad list is actually pretty short, these were even better than we were expecting. If we could make a few wishes we’d wish for an ollie button and slightly longer range on the remotes controls. Also if we’re wishing we’d wish ourselves to be tiny so we could skate around on these things for realsies. If you’re getting two remotes get one that says CH1 on the front and one that says CH2 on the front so you’re not crossing the beams.
Just a warning but do not step on one of these and try to ride it “for science”. You will find yourself making an apology to the whole office as to why you broke the awesome new Tony Hawk Circuit Board.
Getting some Tony Hawk Circuit Boards? Here’s some pro tips we wanted to share in the review:
- Get the full skatepark. Single features are cool but it is way more fun to have the full skatepark.
- Save the boxes, they are good for blocking in the skatepark / halfpipe and raising up ramps.
- Practice, practice, practice.
- When trying to grind the rail come at the rail at a 45 degree angle until you’ve gotten good at it.
- Get multiple poweraxels (power packs) and remotes. Make sure to get both CH1 and CH2 remotes.
Here’s a link to the official Tony Hawk Circuit Boards HEXBUG website if you want to obsess over remote control skateboards like us :-)
Get ‘Em on Amazon!
RIDE Channel Just Exploded Out Of YouTube
We’ve been waiting a little while to give an update/review on this meganews because we wanted to see what’s what with the new RIDE Channel website. Obviously RIDE Channel, the Tony Hawk + YouTube megaventure and hothouse for skating vids, is one of the best YouTube channels period. If you’re watching skateboarding videos on the same Internet we’re on then you’ve been watching RIDE Channel. Example: the Tony Hawk “Perched” video. But RIDE broke out a new .com site recently and we weren’t quite sure what to expect or even what that would change. Turns out this opens up a whole new side to the RIDE.
Remember That Time Tony Hawk & Rodney Mullen Talked About Inventing Kickflips?
That was a RIDE Channel video.
Double RIDE Rainbow? What Does It Even Mean?
Tbh we weren’t sure at first either; it was mostly just the same vids from their YouTube channel. So we let it play out a little during their soft launch in late October. But now we’re in deep and in the past few weeks we’ve gotten a taste of what’s to come out of the new RIDE Channel website. The main thing that’s new: articles. Before RIDE was pretty much nothing but videos now we’re getting a heaping onslaught of senior skateboarding journalism.
Words Are Hard
No kidding, we just wrote this entire review. So thankfully RIDE is now letting loose some of their writers to take the reigns. So far the new skate news over there has run the entire spectrum from kicking up some dust to get riders sponsored to insightful commentary on the skateboarding industry to top 10 lists and re-posts of the vids you know from their YouTube channel. The best of the new stuff (no surprise here) is coming from from the old school skate writer vets. You’ll recognize some of the authors from the sneakerbeast that is Complex and you’re not going crazy: it’s because Tony Hawk partnered with Complex to launch this new side to RIDE. Special shoutout to the new stuff by Lucas Wisenthal who’s written work really shines on the new site.
Videos Are Still The Best Part of RIDE
The new articles are good but RIDE’s bread and butter is still the skating vids.
My Brain Hurts Tell Me What To Think About This Plz
TL;DR – the reviews are in and the RIDE Channel and Tony Hawk have done it again. The website is worth a visit to snag some of the written articles. Missed the link? Click here!
Tony Hawk Hands Out Full Size Tricks For Halloween With Perched
We’re a San Diego company so we’re shameless Tony Hawk fans, (remember our Tony Hawk Circuit Boards article?), but this time our local legend brought even sweeter treats with his latest tricks in his new skate vid Perched that dropped with RIDE Channel. Perched is basically an all out one man vert holiday reel where Tony Hawk reminds you that he’s still the king.
Not Enough Treats? DJ ZTrip Remixed Tony Hawk Pro Skater Songs For This Vid
YEP. HAPPENED. In case you want to rock these jamz yourself and can’t find your PS1…
Circuit Boards – Remote Control Mini Finger Skates By Tony Hawk, Birdhouse, and HEXBUG? WANT.
Its not hard to see why Tony Hawk has recently been promoting these new remote control Tech Deck style minis: they’re awesome. Finger boards are already sweet, we have a ton of them in the shop, but we have to admit that while we never considered making them remote control we’re now shocked we’ve been living without electric finger skates this long. Check out the official vid from HEXBUG:
UPDATE: Tony Hawk Circuit Boards are now available on Amazon!
FINGERBOARDING IS CHANGED FOREVER
Those ramps looks super sweet and kinda remind us of rad Hot Wheels ramps. We’re wondering how these handle when grinding but it does appear in the video that if you hit the ramps just right you are able to pull some sick stunts. One of the big comments online was they appear need an ollie button; we agree but we’re still willing to shoot some footy regardless. Possibly in slow mo.
No word yet on when these rad things are launching but sources, (and by sources we mean the Circuit Boards website,) say early September. If you keep a close eye on Tony Hawk’s FB page you’ll see the vid he posted. There’s also a lot of material on the official Circuit Boards website. If you make it out to see Tony Hawk and Birdhouse on tour they’re handing out these things FOR FREE. Anybody got one? How are they? TELL US EVERYTHING.
We’re a San Diego based company so today we’re celebrating Tony Hawk Day! In recognition of his philanthropic efforts the City of San Diego has declared today, May 29th, Tony Hawk Day. Tony Hawk has given San Diego one of the coolest skate parks evarrrrrrr and helped raise millions of $$$ for hundreds of other skate parks around the country. He’s taken taking skating to the next level… to the next level. As a legend in the sport and the most widely known name in skating Tony Hawk has done some amazing things and we’re stoked and thankful he’s an SD local.
To celebrate the awesomeness that is is Tony Hawk and Tony Hawk Day we’re giving 15% OFF EVERYTHING if you use the coupon code TONYHAWK so go design skate & celebrate!